Jasmine Swain-Northwood University

So, I Finished My MBA! What Did I Learn About MYSELF?

Gosh, I cannot believe I can finally say this…BUT I FINISHED MY MBA in Management!!!!

Y’all these were the hardest two years of my life. Why? I had to balance being a wife, full-time student, business professional, philanthropist, pageant queen and business owner. And baaaabbbyyyyy I am beat! I am no stranger to hard work and prioritizing so I figured, how hard could it be? Let me just say, that this was a time where all too often I felt like I had bitten off way more than I could chew. I am grateful that I did it now, while I have no children, and while I am living in a totally different state than my immediate family. Everything happens for a reason, sis. It was super important for me to be a good steward of this time and the season I am in at this point in my life. One of my favorite sayings is “GET YOU SOME BUSINESS” lol. What that means is get busy, get active and get accountable. There is no time for distractions or complacency. So, it’s no surprise that I felt like this was a key investment I made in myself. One that I know will reap long-term dividends.

So anyway, what did I learn about myself during my pursuit of this degree?

1.) I realized that I am far more organized than I give myself credit for. I tested in a 95th percentile for my ability to be strategic in the way that I prioritize my time and hold myself accountable for action items.

2.) I am one heck of a leader, meaning I am excellent at empowering other to reach their full potential. I am able to use my influence to reach various goals while remaining sensitive to the business needs. I see this one every day in my day-to-day interactions. Not just professionally, but personally. I spend hours every week mentoring and speaking life into my inner circle of family and friends. Why? Because I want to see them WIN. When they win, we all do. Who doesn’t want to be on a winning team?! I end up being the biggest cheerleader to anyone who is in need of the encouragement necessary to get them to their next level. What good is having influence is you never use it. (A lot of rhetoricals here but roll with me)

3.) Chile, I am THE BEST at problem solving. Not to toot my own horn (but if I don’t who will haha). I noticed that my ability to display sound judgment and key understanding of problematic situations is often unmatched. Often times, people bring me a problem and while I would be actively listening to them, I couldn’t help but think “How can I help them fix this?” This was something that was a HARD habit to overcome, and truthfully is something I still struggle with. However, I learned how to spend more time on the actual problem opposed to immediately working on a solution. In short, it’s not enough to have the all answers, Sway. But if you are equipped with the tools to break down the problem, you are less likely to experience it again. Moreover, you will be in a better position to reach a quicker solution, should you encounter something similar in the future.

4.) Lastly, even though I already knew this about myself, I learned that my communication skills are impeccable. (I literally laughed out loud, as I wrote this. BUT ITS TRUUUEEE) I absolutely love presenting information to people, especially specific audiences for which I know I can relate. Selecting the best mode or medium to connect is my specialty. Like I mentioned, I knew this was something I was good at, but sometimes you don’t know you are good at something until someone tells you. Crazy because we should already know our strengths, right?

I really just learned that I know more than I give myself credit for. For whatever I don’t know, IT’S OKAY NOT TO KNOW. But, am I willing to find the answer, though? I, like many other Black women, suffer from severe imposter syndrome. Although you probably can’t tell from the tone of this post, IT’S REAL, GIRL! So, getting my MBA was less about professional development and more about being perceived as MORE THAN ENOUGH. My excellence complex is on TEN, so going after my MBA felt like the least I could do. Ultimately, challenging myself at this level of academia has been the ultimate reward. WE NOT GON EVEN TALK ABOUT THE DEBT I ACQUIRED TO DO THIS, THOUGH (FUNNY, but not funny -insert drunk face emoji-) Anywho, the skills I gained are the confidence boost I desperately needed, and the impact on my future will be mind blowing! You have to speak it into existence, right?

I often joke and say being an adult is Ghetto. Why? Well, because it is. It’s the only “hood” that no one told us not to drive through. It’s the only hood that always has its hand out for something and its the only hood that kicks you when you are down because it just doesn’t care about you.

I remember when I was a kid my mom would always say I couldn’t have the freedom I wanted because I wasn’t “Grown”. I remember thinking “Dang, I can’t wait until I’m Grown, then I can do what I want”. What she didn’t warn me about was the fact that in order to maintain the lifestyle she exposed me to, I would need to work, and WORK HARD. So, yeah I can do what I want, but at what cost.

I say all this to say that the biggest thing about adulthood is you must work to sustain any level of life. In order to do that you have to work everyday despite what may be going on in your life. Any other day or week I am okay with that reality, as thats just what we have to do as strong adults. Between returning to work through a pandemic and navigating through an emotional “Social Unrest”, as the world is calling it, it’s a lot for one person to handle.

In my line of work, I work with business owners who often aren’t exposed to real live black people. So with that comes great responsibility on my part to answer their questions, share my opinion and hold them accountable where necessary. It is extremely hard to do all that and remain professional but I’ve been doing it everyday since this whole thing started. What does it mean to be professional? According to Merriam-Webster, professionalism means to conduct, aims, or qualities that characterize or mark a profession. In my opinion, this means to communicate with tact. This is easy for us all to do, right? Who cares that we are in the midst of a global pandemic or people are being killed on video, right? Can you complete your deliverables in time, though? That’s the only thing that seems to be important. While disheartening, this was the reality I was faced with. Naturally, this says that something needs to change within the workplace as it relates to human compassion and interaction, but I digress.

These past couple weeks have challenged me emotionally and helped me to realize something that has become a bit of an expectation for black people. That realization is this, WE ARE STRONG, yeah I know you already knew that. But really, we are stronger than we ever have been. How many people can be dying on the inside from systemic racism/racism in general and still push through? Not many, but because of who we are and what we have been through, for the sake of being our ancestors wildest dreams we get things done. Why? Because we have to. Even though you are wounded you still have the ability to maintain your professionalism, whatever that means lol. Point is, you’ve got this. The world is changing for the better and its all because of you. Never mind the fact that you may be asked how you are doing, and my not even have the words to describe your true emotional state. Regardless of being wounded you are powerful and you are worthy! In the words of the iconic Martin Lawerence, “YOU, Go, girl!!”